Mike Rowe and the SWEAT pledge

So, I recently came across a topic on reddit that asked what celebrity people would like to see as president. I basically said none of them since I'd like a politician like Sanders to run again, but I read the comments, and to my horror, one of the top people mentioned was none other than Mike Rowe.

Now, you must be asking, what's so bad about Mike Rowe? Well, as you probably know he has that dirty jobs show, which is all well and cool and all, nothing wrong with that, but on top of having that show, he tends to be a bit of an ideologue in pushing his weird creepy dystopian work ethic thing. As you guys know, I'm critical of capitalism, critical of work ethic, and critical of the concept of work, and while I respect those who do hard labor, I don't encourage a culture that makes these things out to be more noble than they have to be. I mean, we gotta do what we gotta do, but given the opportunity presents itself, we should probably do away with work, and even now I believe we should make it more voluntary and also make it easier in whatever ways possible. Work is utilitarian in nature and is a means to an end (to make stuff and provide services we need and enjoy), not an end in itself.

Anyway, Mike Rowe has this thing called the "SWEAT pledge", which stands for "Skill & Work Ethic Aren't Taboo" and reads like something out of Fink Industries in Bioshock Infinite. It's creepy. It's almost 1984ish in what attitudes it encourages people to adopt. And with that, I'm going to start responding to the thing point by point.

1. I believe that I have won the greatest lottery of all time. I am alive. I walk the Earth. I live in America. Above all things, I am grateful.

Okay, this particular point isn't too bad. Nothing wrong with a little optimism and being glad to be alive. Of course, viewpoints that critique such a perspective are valid too. But I'll generally give this one a free pass in and of itself, and maybe revisit it later in conjunction with a point that I feel it's more apt to criticize.

2. I believe that I am entitled to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Nothing more. I also understand that “happiness” and the “pursuit of happiness” are not the same thing.

 What we're "entitled" to is really a matter of what we as a society deem each human being "deserves", and this is very subjective. As a critic of "natural rights theory", which is what this statement comes from (read Locke, or the declaration of independence), I'll say that if we really want to come down to it, we're not even entitled to these things. In a state of nature, animals kill each other, for fun, for food, etc., and humans are animals. Our history is mired by things like warfare and slavery. This conception of what we're entitled to is an ideological statement,and is highly subjective and human made. We can make anything we want into an entitlement assuming it's something we can enforce. This whole document is mired in a certain ideological viewpoint that will become clearer as this article goes on.

If we want to come down to my views, I do believe that there's nothing wrong with human beings being "entitled" to things, and while I don't necessarily disagree with the ideas above, I will disagree with the statement of "nothing more", and also say that we should strive for actual happiness when possible. I believe that living materially better, easier, happier lives is the essence of social progress. I do believe people should be entitled to the basics needed to live a good life, and that these things are necessary for a positive concept of liberty like that I believe in.

3. I believe there is no such thing as a “bad job.” I believe that all jobs are opportunities, and it’s up to me to make the best of them.

Okay, this is where this gets a bit freaky. Point 1, not so bad, point 2, eh, getting a little ideological, point 3 comes the whammy. So let's recap. I'm lucky that I'm here (point 1), I'm entitled to nothing (point 2), and now, all jobs are opportunities and I should make the best of them. This implies a metric crapton of assumptions. It assumes people should not be entitled to certain things, be it basic needs, or, heck, in this case, even labor laws. All jobs are an opportunity. So if you're a 5 year old, and you're owed nothing, is working in a factory an opportunity? We're not entitled to laws against child labor after all. Is working in a dangerous environment where you risk bodily harm an opportunity? After all, you're not owed OSHA. Is it an opportunity to work for $1 an hour? After all, there's no minimum wage. I'm sorry, but this is a bunch of BS. Not all jobs should be treated as "opportunities", because many jobs force people to do all kinds of crappy things to survive. And Mike Rowe of all people should be aware of some of these things, he does have a show in which he looks at some of the worst jobs out there.

This whole treatment of jobs as opportunities only makes sense within the acceptance of right wing capitalistic ideals as espoused by this guy's ideology. People are entitled to nothing, which includes their basic needs, and every job is an "opportunity" to earn said needs. This is, by any other name, slavery. You can't really say no, because the alternative to agreeing to it is basically to incur bodily harm via neglect of your needs. It's like a gun to the head, only slower and more painful. But hey, you can always accept an "opportunity" to work for others for a wage, so you can survive. And just about every rational person will accept such an "opportunity" given the alternative. It's basically a roundabout form of coercion.

4. I do not “follow my passion.” I bring it with me. I believe that any job can be done with passion and enthusiasm.

This is getting really creepy now. Not only is every job, no matter how crappy an opportunity, but now he wants people to be passionate about any job they get. The purpose of these statements is to basically stop people from looking at their situation as something forced on them, but more as something they actively accept and embrace. By being entitled to nothing, treating every job as an opportunity, and passionately executing all tasks, you're no longer thinking at all about how this is basically backdoor slavery. You are accepting the paradigm forced on you. You're not just passively accepting it at this stage, you're now actively accepting it, with enthusiasm. This stops people from questioning this system. It cultivates them as good little wage slaves. It's thought control. Plain and simple.

5. I deplore debt, and do all I can to avoid it. I would rather live in a tent and eat beans than borrow money to pay for a lifestyle I can’t afford.

This point...isn't half bad in some ways. I mean, debt should be avoided, and honestly, I see debt was a way to enslave the working classes. But what's the real problem here? Could it be that we are not giving people lifestyles they deserve in my opinion and he doesn't seem to think that they deserve? That he's encouraging people to be these little happy worker drones who will do every task asked of them by the glorious "job creators" with passion and enthusiasm?

And holy crap, the live in a tent and eat beans part. Yep. No one should have to live like that. Not in America. I was having a conversation with a friend before writing this on this subject. This is literally saying it's okay to be homeless, possibly in the middle of winter, living in a tent city and eating beans than being in debt. What the heck. But again, the part that really miffs me is the fact that no one should have to live like this. But hey, I guess I don't agree with his ideologically fueled clause about what I'm entitled to.

6. I believe that my safety is my responsibility. I understand that being in “compliance” does not necessarily mean I’m out of danger.

This one is up to debate. I mean, there's no harm in going above and beyond OSHA regulations, except maybe the elites' pocket books and you know what? Between safety and profits, screw profits. But, looking at this, it could also be a swipe at labor laws altogether. Like those laws aren't good for much and that we need to take personal responsibility to be safe. A very libertarian attitude for a very libertarian guy. It's hard to really interpret this one well though, so I don't know.

7. I believe the best way to distinguish myself at work is to show up early, stay late, and cheerfully volunteer for every crappy task there is.

I WILL BE A GOOD LITTLE WAGE SLAVE. EVERY JOB IS AN OPPORTUNITY. I WILL EXECUTE EVERY JOB WITH PASSION AND ENTHUSIASM. I WILL VOLUNTEER FOR EVERY CRAPPY TASK THERE IS TO PROVE MY WORTH TO THE GLORIOUS JOB CREATORS.

Sorry, the best response to this one, given the others is to respond to it ruthlessly through mocking. Because the above is exactly what it sounds like. More cultivation of the perfect little unquestioning wage slave.

 8. I believe the most annoying sounds in the world are whining and complaining. I will never make them. If I am unhappy in my work, I will either find a new job, or find a way to be happy.

I WILL BE A GOOD LITTLE WAGE SLAVE. EVERY JOB IS AN OPPORTUNITY. I WILL EXECUTE EVERY JOB WITH PASSION AND ENTHUSIASM. I WILL VOLUNTEER FOR EVERY CRAPPY TASK THERE IS TO PROVE MY WORTH TO THE GLORIOUS JOB CREATORS. I WILL NOT COMPLAIN ABOUT MY CONDITION. NOTHING IS MORE ANNOYING THAN WHINING AND COMPLAINING. IF I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPLAIN I WILL GO WITHOUT DAILY SUSTENANCE UNTIL I FIND A NEW OPPORTUNITY TO LICK MY MASTERS' BOOTS.

Yep, more wage slave cultivation...

 9. I believe that my education is my responsibility, and absolutely critical to my success. I am resolved to learn as much as I can from whatever source is available to me. I will never stop learning, and understand that library cards are free.

Well, while I won't bash a guy for telling people to go learn something, I think there's a problem here. He's not encouraging people to actually learn how to think critically. If he was, they would be able to debunk this BS propaganda of his that is dumbing people down into being good little wage slaves. He's encouraging them to learn in order to be useful to their employers and make money. Huge difference there.

Mike, you got a library card, and I believe you need to brush up on your understanding of both history and political theory. Why don't you go check out Independence, Propertylessness, and Basic Income: A Theory of Freedom and the Power to Say No by Karl Widerquist, for starters? I found this to be a particular useful blueprint for my personal ideology regarding work ethic, and you'll be exposed to lots of challenging ideas that are very different (and arguably better) than yours here. You might also wanna read stuff like, say, idk, Rousseau, Mill, Marx, and others. You know, the classics. You need exposure to ideologies other than right wing libertarian "I will be grateful to my masters for the ability to make them money" BS.

10. I believe that I am a product of my choices – not my circumstances. I will never blame anyone for my shortcomings or the challenges I face. And I will never accept the credit for something I didn’t do.

Going off his last point, my education that tells me this is BS. Circumstances matter a lot, and we should be striving to give everyone the best life they can live. Seems like a way to encourage victim blaming. If you're in a bad spot, it's not because of the system or anything like that, it's YOUR fault. This further insulates the system from being questioned, and also turns around the blame for any bad circumstances onto YOU.

11. I understand the world is not fair, and I’m OK with that. I do not resent the success of others.

This statement further stops people from questioning the system and the way things are. Don't like the situation you're in? Life isn't fair. Want to redistribute the wealth or something like that (kind of like my basic income proposal)? This statement basically implies that they earned it, you didn't, and that you have no right to do it. Basically, take responsibility for your "failures" and don't think about trying to question the system of who gets what in any way. The system is just, it's okay life isn't fair. Accept what we tell you to accept.

 12. I believe that all people are created equal. I also believe that all people make choices. Some choose to be lazy. Some choose to sleep in. I choose to work my butt off.

I WILL BE A GOOD LITTLE WAGE SLAVE....

Did I tell you that this should be read in a robot voice? When I use caps in this post, you should totally read that as a robot voice.

But yeah, this is more ignoring of circumstances, imposing a system of "personal responsibility" on people, and basically saying those who work hard will get rewarded, and those who don't succeed are lazy or suffering some other character flaw. Once again, the system is just, the system is fair, nothing to see here. Don't question the way things are, blah blah blah.

And again, I really question the idea of whether people should have to work just to get their basic needs. Sure, there can be differences and rewards based on effort, I think such a thing is necessary for society to function properly. But in a modern capitalist context, this idea seems unnecessary and harmful. Not that Rowe would want you to think like that. His pledge seems to encourage an ideology much counter to that.

 On my honor, I hereby affirm the above statements to be an accurate summation of my personal worldview. I promise to live by them.

Signed_______________________________________ Dated____________________

 Yeah, no, I'm not signing that. Sorry.

Well, there you have it. People actually think this guy would be a good president. What the fudge. That's scary. This guy is scary. I'm not against the idea of people working hard jobs if they NEED to be done, but we shouldn't glorify these jobs or encourage people to take on these humiliating and degrading attitudes that basically turn people into happy little wage slaves. Creepy. Really creepy.

The whole point of this pledge is to basically cultivate the working class (most of society) into being good little obedient wage slaves. It starts off telling people to be happy to be alive and that they're owed nothing, and then cultivates attitudes in workers to make them enthusiastically accept crap tasks, without complaining, and to work their lives away without demanding positive changes to their condition. It's abusive, really abusive It encourages a system based on personal responsibility and basically tells people that if they're unhappy with their lot it's their fault and they need to work harder to make things better. Critical thinking and questioning the system is discouraged subtly all throughout the pledge and people are basically encouraged to accept things are, not only without complaining, but while enthusiastically accepting it's values.

Anyway, for posterity's sake, I'm going to end this posting a parody version of this pledge that really shifts the ideological elements of it to a more left wing perspective to show people what it really is. Remember to read it in a robot voice!

1. I AM WAGE SLAVE BOT 9000. I AM HAPPY TO BE ALIVE.

2. I AM OWED NOTHING.

3. RECOGNIZING I AM OWED NOTHING, I WILL TREAT EVERY JOB AS AN OPPORTUNITY TO SERVE MY MASTERS. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A BAD JOB.

4. I WILL EXECUTE EVERY TASK WITH PASSION AND ENTHUSIASM. I WILL GLADLY SERVE MY MASTERS WITH A SMILE ON MY FACE.

5. I WILL LIVE WITHIN MY LIMITED MEANS EVEN IF IT MEANS THAT I HAVE TO BE HOMELESS. I AM OWED NOTHING. I AM GRATEFUL TO MY MASTERS FOR EVERYTHING.

6. SAFETY SCHMAFETY. SAFETY LAWS ARE FOR CHUMPS AND IT IS MY RESPONSIBILITY TO ENSURE I DO NOT HURT MYSELF SERVING MASTER. IF I LOSE A FEW FINGERS OR SOMETHING ON THE JOB THAT IS MY OWN FAULT FOR NOT BEING CAREFUL ENOUGH.

7. I WILL SERVE MY MASTER WITH ENTHUSIASM AND GIVE UP ANY SEMBLANCE OF HAVING A LIFE OF MY OWN IN ORDER TO BETTER SERVE MASTER. I WILL VOLUNTEER FOR EVERY CRAPPY TASK THEY GIVE ME TO SHOW THEM HOW USEFUL I AM.

8. I WILL NOT COMPLAIN OR WHINE ABOUT THE TASKS MY MASTER GIVES ME. IF I AM UNHAPPY WITH THE TASKS HE GIVES ME I WILL FIND A NEW MASTER EVEN IF IT MEANS DENYING MYSELF THE MEANS TO SURVIVE IN THE MEANTIME.

9. I WILL ALWAYS TRY TO LEARN MORE WAYS TO BE USEFUL TO MASTER.

10. CIRCUMSTANCES SCHMIRCUMSTANCES, I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL OF MY OWN FAILINGS. I WILL NOT BLAME MASTER OR THE SYSTEM OR OTHER WAGE SLAVES.

11. I WILL NOT QUESTION THE MECHANISMS THAT DETERMINE WHO GETS WHAT. LIFE IS NOT FAIR AND PEOPLE WHO HAVE MORE THAN ME DESERVE IT. I WILL NOT ADVOCATE FOR CHANGES TO THIS SYSTEM SUCH AS THE REDISTRIBUTION OF WEALTH.

12. CIRCUMSTANCES SMIRCUMSTANCES, IT ALL COMES DOWN TO PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY. PEOPLE WHO FAIL DID SO BECAUSE THEY WERE LAZY AND LIKED SLEEP MORE THAN SERVING MASTER. I WILL WORK MY BUTT OFF IN SERVING MASTER AND CHOOSE TO BE A GOOD LITTLE WAGE SLAVE BOT.

I HEREBY DEDICATE MY LIFE TO SERVING MASTER AND CONSIDER THE ABOVE TO BE MY PERSONAL WORLDVIEW. I PROMISE TO LIVE BY THEM. 

SIGNED: WAGE SLAVE BOT 9000  DATE: 11/17/16

See through the ideology yet? I hope so...