So, I'm going to discuss something a bit more personal for me, since it pertains to my blog. I've been reading my old posts from 2016, and I mentioned atheism and my worldview back then a lot. It was the bedrock on top of which the rest of my belief system rests on. You change my underlying belief system, and you could potentially change my belief system of the world.
What brought about this change?
I will not get into the whole story as it's deeply personal and people might think I'm crazy if I do, but long story short, I had an anecdotal experience. To put it in ways that one can understand, back when I deconverted, there was a major personal issue that drove some of it. While my reasons for leaving were rational and objective, this personal issue did drive me to do the research I did in the first place. It was just something that did not make sense. Like, I really felt like I was being "called" to do something, and it kind of blew up in my face, and as the fallout settled, I took a good hard look at my belief system and decided I was mistaken about it. That it was all in my head and that I had to have been wrong on this. I went over the issue a lot, speculating about what could have gone wrong, but I could not come up with anything to justify my view. When I deconverted, I decided to leave a backdoor open in my logic, in which if I was given clarity on this particular issue, that I would consider believing again. The odds of it happening were very low, and it would need to have happened retroactively as well. Well, I kinda figured it out. And there was something about it I was not aware of at the time, and it kind of forces me to reconsider things. This happened about two years ago. Ironically a big trigger for this was the Andrew Yang Joe Rogan interview causing me to retrace certain things in my life, causing me to stumble upon that missing piece.
Anyway, at this point I feel like I lost a bet vs "god" almost, so I kind of feel like I have to accept this as real. Now, I want to make it clear, I AM NOT religious and I WILL NOT go back to Christianity. That said, to discuss my perspective...
Okay, so what do I believe?
Well, it's complicated. My current worldview trends toward the "new agey" perspective in a way, but I try to be more grounded and less into woo and the like. While I believe a creator god exists, I'm under the impression it is less personal and almost deistic. I believe that we are souls, and that we are all technically fragments of this being, but with our own individuality and experiences. I believe we incarnate into universes like this to have experiences and learn things, and that things are very hands off, and things are left to fall where they may. While I believe each soul has a plan or itinerary while here, we can deviate from this for better or worse. Eventually, we die, and after spending time in our home realm (let's call it "heaven" for simplicity's sake), we reincarnate again here or somewhere else. As for who the "god" is I seem to have a dialogue with, it is likely a spirit guide, who tends to guide me through my life. I believe everyone has a guide, and some may have a personal relationship with their guide. When Christians claim to have a personal relationship with Jesus, it's likely actually their guide if they're talking to anyone at all.
That's just about the summary of it.
Well, can you prove it?
Quite simply, no. But when I align my experiences with my research, that is what I largely conclude. If you are interested in a few types of works that might give some general ideas into my worldview, I can suggest some. I think that hypnotherapists like Michael Newton or Brian Weiss could potentially uncover some of our past and between life experiences and much of my overall structure of the universe. Ian Stevenson and Jim Tucker seem to do good work into reincarnation. Others look at things like near death experiences. It should be noted, none of this can be proven beyond all doubts. I don't think it's disproven either. You might ask, why believe in it, and it's again, because of my experiences.
What happens if I don't believe?
Chill out, you're not going to hell. I quite frankly don't even think hell exists, or if it does it's not like the whole Biblical eternal burny torture place. That's a christian thing. I encourage people who may be atheist and ex christian to have much looser assumptions about god. Yes, Yahweh isn't real. The christian perspective is full of crap. You're not going to suffer any consequences for not believing. As a matter of fact, if you don't believe, perhaps your spirit guides want it that way, for whatever reason. I mean, we do kind of forget all of our memories and are given free will when we're here. It's like a double blind scientific experiment. Can't test for something if you know you're being tested. Knowing how everything works might spoil the entire reason you're here by influencing your decisions.
Believe, don't believe, it doesn't make any difference. I'm not evangelical about this. I'm only explaining it because of what it might mean for my blog posts.
What effect does this have on my political views?
As you have seen over the past two years, remarkably little. Here's the thing. While I tend to preach a nihilistic universe with no purpose, I really don't think that my revelations tend to really....contradict that much. I mean, again, we're kind of put in a situation where we have no reason to believe this stuff when we come here, and many actual religions are likely flat out wrong. I don't think that the people who are in the know really want us to know everything, and often even anything. The simulation is to go on with the total ignorance or near ignorance of the populace. Otherwise it would not be an immersive experience, and otherwise it would change our behavior. Given my ideology up through now has been drawn largely from my observations of how this world operates, my views do not change much. I'm most pointing this out for the sake of my intellectual honesty and transparency.
If anything, it gives me more purpose in my views. Based on my own experiences with this stuff, the kind of setup I went through is not unheard of. Some people go through strange, stressful experiences causing them to lose their faith and former belief system for the sake of causing them to learn something. And my experiences sound exactly like one of those setups. So now, here I am, years later, like oh crap this is real after all, but I can understand now that perhaps the whole point of my doing that was to learn a lesson. Why? Well, perhaps my own purpose for being here has to do with those experiences. It has changed me as a person, and I will strongly and unapologetically push for my views.
I guess if it changed anything, it's this. I probably am more invested in stopping climate change. I kind of had that revelation later in 2019. I was on vacation, and I ended up at a Bernie Sanders rally I never expected to go to. And what was discussed? Climate change. And it can have a bad effect on communities, including the coastal community I was on vacation at. It's a huge reason I temporarily ceded my pro UBI agenda to the Bernie crowd, and don't give Biden that much crap for proposing a job's program. This stuff needs to happen. Even if it's not what I would ideally do, this stuff needs to be taken care of before I can push for UBI, given UBI is not viable at the moment. Although, given the fact that the very next year we went full force into a pandemic, well, I'm back on pushing for UBI again. Because let's face it, UBI would fix this. And perhaps less of a fixation on work would also curb climate change as our whole maximal productivity mindset is kind of what's driving all of this environmental destruction in the first place.
But beyond that, it doesn't change anything. We should still treat the world as nihilistic, because it does not seem like there is any inherent purpose for all humans to partake in. People are all here for their own reasons and need to find their own happiness, so let's just leave it at that. Moreover, we should not even be basing politics on unproven spiritual views much to begin with, so everything about my political perspective can be justified from a secular point of view too.
Conclusion
Well, that's that. I just wanted to share this for the sake of transparency about where I stand on things.
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