Why privilege shaming doesn't work

 So, I ended up experiencing another toxic privilege shamer online who is still pushing the whole blue no matter who thing, and they really said something that to me got to the heart of the matter of why I hate these people so much, and why their tactics aren't effective to me.

Because he and his gang of nerds couldn't handle minorities and people who were effected telling them that their actions of leaving them to wolves to for some cheast thumping meant they would never forgive them, never would align with them, and questioned their moral character.

It's hard to take people seriously as progressives when they dismiss the main hallmark of progressivism, which is "protecting the most vulnerable".

 I left some context out to preserve some anonymity, as this guy was calling out a specific group of people, and I don't want to go into them, or their behavior (they're third party voters who refuse to vote blue no matter who), but yeah, basically he was going on about how they "can't handle" being criticized or having their "moral character" questioned. 

Now, I did go off on this guy myself in defense of those guys, because I hate this behavior myself, and I've voted third party in the past, and even if I am supporting Biden/dems this election cycle, I still despise this kind of behavior. 

But...you can kind of see the problem. It comes from this second part:

It's hard to take people seriously as progressives when they dismiss the main hallmark of progressivism, which is "protecting the most vulnerable".

 I'll just say it. Who the F is this guy to define what progressivism is to other people? I don't agree with this definition. I don't accept this definition. Social justice warriors and the identity politics crowd DO NOT OWN the term "progressivism." 

I've, on this blog, largely discussed three groups of people before. You got regressives, conservatives, and progressives. Regressives wanna make society go backwards, conservatives want the status quo, and progressives want to bring it forward. I call myself a progressive because I want to bring society forward in some way. What does bringing society forward mean? It means making things better for people. Improving health, well being, or making things more pleasant or people happier. It's being for good things, and advocating for society to change to allow more good things to happen.

Regressives, on the other hand, are the opposite of that. They want to bring society backwards, often undoing previous progress and making society worse. And conservatives, well, they kinda wanna keep it the same.

Often times, in American society, we actually live in a world where what we call "conservatives" are actually regressives. We see it with SCOTUS and their judicial activism, not only are they very much in favor of change, but they are most interested in undoing the progress made under the previous liberal SCOTUS going back to the 1960s. They actively want to make society worse in my view, and I would classify them as "evil" under my own ethical system. And a lot of it is because not only are they not for good things, they're ANTI good things and want to bring us back to a more primitive state where people suffer more than they do now.

The real conservatives in society these days are actually moderate liberals. They are the ones fixated on institutional norms, and making few societal changes, with the societal changes they wanna make being very slow and incremental. 

And of course, progressives are the left. BUT...and this is where the SJWs seem to make their mistake, there are many kinds of progressive and left. And not all of them are actually on the same page as them.

Their moral system is a very specific one rooted in identity politics and intersectionality. It's specifically about caring primarily for those more vulnerable to them and being empathetic and selfless toward them to the point of self sacrifice. 

I reject this ideology outright. I mean, of social issues, i'm probably the most moderate on those related to race. Because I'm just...neutral on the issue. I dont care. I dont wanna deal with race. I dont wanna make a big deal about it. i think doing so just creates resentment, and in leftie circles, i think these politics are weaponized in order to shame people to vote democrat. I mean, I've had SJWs tell me that i should vote not for myself but for "our black brothers and sister" and crap like that and I'm just like F that, I'm voting for me. And that's where most progressives who wont go third party are. They DONT share that value system. They see it as toxic and hostile to their own.

With me, I've gone further. I've shifted away from an empathy based mindset. I've always been logical with my politics, and empathy can have an influence in my logic, but as you guys can tell, I AM a bit colder than most lefties. I DONT lean into empathy. I don't care. Because empathy can be weaponized against me, and I know it, and that's exactly what these people are doing.

If anything, I've leaned more into my "enlightened self interest" thing where my own ideological system assumes self interest but also assumes that left wing ideas, properly understood, are supportive of peoples' self interest. But it does require a bit of enlightenment, like looking at the big picture, thinking long term, etc, and not just making the move that best provides short term self gratification. It's about understanding the sociological imagination and how systems affect individuals and their circumstances. 

And on women and LGBTQ+ people...applying enlightened self interest...I just dont care either. But because enlightened self interest generally leans to libertarianism, and most issues surrounding women and LGBTQ+ people like abortion and sexual liberalization fall well within libertarianism, I can claim those positions. Because I wouldnt want my freedom restricted either.

But that's the thing. In some ways, while this did allow me to come over to the left when I used to be a conservative moral authoritarian a la religion, it only makes me a relatively passive ally. Because at the end of the day, it doesnt affect me and I dont care. And that's actually how the left won the moral high ground on this stuff to begin with. I'll tell you exactly how gay marriage became accepted. People left religion and stopped caring. They kinda realized that them doing their thing doesnt affect anyone else, so they kinda were like "eh whatever, let them get married".

Contrast this with this new social justice left that moral polices people for not actively caring about these issues and making them their complete focus. And that's where these guys go wrong. You can't force people to care. And while I would say that SJWs are "progressive", they don't own or define the term, and their problem is that they just assume everyone has, or should have their moral system, and guess what? WE DONT. 

And if we don't share a common morality, not only is your moral shaming not effective, it's counter productive. because to be blunt, you just come off as annoying self righteous jerks. 

I mean, to be honest, identity issues and that framing of issues, is near the bottom of my list of cares. Those issues are the ones I'm most conservative on when framed that way, and I just don't care. I mean, one of the only hot topics I care about less is gaza. 

Which is ironically the issue the above people are mostly protest voting over. They dont represent me either. I voted for jill stein in 2016 over economics, these guys in 2024 are doing it over gaza. We're not the same. And ironically, maybe the weirdo gaza protesters and the SJWs have more in common than they would with me. Both of them have a moral system based primarily around empathy and caring for others, as well as superficially virtue signalling about that fact in a way I find completely insufferable. And I guess, in that sense, the SJWs have a point. I mean, I'd rather care about people in THIS country rather than half way across the world. Just higher in my hierarchy of priorities. 

But then again, with me at least, you try this identity stuff on me, and not only will I NOT care, I'll intentionally try to come off as a jerk against you to teach you a lesson for trying that on me. I've alienated a lot of lefties before who are pretty offended and horrified by my opinions at times. And it baffles them. Like, how can I be so callous? Some of them literally think I'm a bad person or "the worst kind of leftie", and you know what? Bite me. Because I know what I am, I know what I'm not, and I'm NOT "of you" or "one of you." You have to appeal to me on my own terms, appealing to issues I find interesting or important. 

And that's why privilege shaming doesn't work. Because if I don't value what you value, and you can't find common ground with me, then we're not gonna agree. Even worse, when I don't back down and bend the knee to you and your ideology and morality, you're actually gonna piss me off if anything with the privilege shaming stuff. Which is just gonna push me even further away from your ethical system. I mean, for the record, I used to be a lot more friendly toward the social justice types 10 years ago. I was never super into it, and I never was gonna be, but I at least felt more willing to work with them to achieve common goals or see them as benign. But as they've become this weird mind virus trying to take over all of progressivism and gatekeep who belongs and who doesn't, I've become more hostile toward them, because the more I realize I'm not "of them", I also know that they're not "of me" morally, or hold similar values to what I do. Which just makes me wanna crap on them more.

In other words, as we find out our mutual differences, their hostility makes me hostile to them in response. So not only does privilege shaming not work, it ultimately makes me hostile to the idea of privilege altogether. 

So their attempt to find common ground with me through shaming backfires horribly to the point that I'll start enjoying telling them that their appeals have no power here. Or if I'm not in the mood, I'll do what the above group was being criticized for and just shut out anyone who even tries that crap with me. Because I just become so hostile toward it that it gets to the point of just "attacking on sight" or responding negatively. 

This is also what the right does. But they are worse. They also tend to enjoy owning the libs, but they take it to the point of holding the opposite ethics or values, and take pleasure in being extremely offensive, whereas I'm still kinda neutral as my value system just values different things. But in a lot of ways, I'd argue the trumpers exist and took off in part as a gross overreact to these weirdo moralistic types. They are literally turned off and alienated like I am but their values are so opposite to them they become "regressive" and wanna go the other way, whereas I just remain more "conservative" and neutral. 

With me, I'm still ultimately focused on my goals. My big problem with SJW types is them getting in my way. When they dont get in my way, I don't get in theirs. But they DO get in my way and pull this privilege crap on me, so that's why I feel a need to go after them. Again, I used to be more cordial to them until they started explicitly attempting to shame me and get in my face for not sacrificing my priorities on the altar of white male liberal guilt. Because I understand they're just trying to make the world a better place in their own way. We just have serious differences about what that looks like.

But as far as my voting habits, that's just how I am. I vote in accordance with my own conscience. I've voted green in the past, this time im voting for biden as i think that the current circumstances call for it, but what I'm NOT doing is voting democrat because i care about identity politics. Because at the end I don't care. And I'm not afraid to express such an opinion at this point.